You have Konjo.

On my monthly visit to practice English conversation with my delightful Fujisawa ladies, I enjoyed a delicious Japanese lunch. Kato-san started off the meal with kanen yose mosuku, something like the consistency of jello but containing seaweed and ginger. It was quite good ... but definitely a challenge for the chopstick novice.

I have chopstick envy – these Japanese ladies can deftly pick up their food with elegant chopsticks, making the act of eating look more like an art form than merely taking care of sustenance. Since we arrived in Japan nearly a year ago I have tried my hand at using chopsticks - every chance I get I use them, but I will confess that when we are at home I revert back to what we now call the "shovel" (i.e. fork). There is an elegance and grace to using chopsticks - smaller bites, more time to let the brain register with the stomach that you've had enough to eat, time to enjoy the food you are eating instead of what has typically become an unintentional race in our house to finish your meal before you're out the door for the next thing.

The kanen yose mosuku was my ultimate chopstick food challenge so far. Kato-san had placed beautiful lacquered chopsticks at each setting and while my Japanese friends managed to enjoy their dish, I struggled to keep the "jello" on the chopstick. As soon as I would pick it up it would slide right off. Smaller pieces did not seem to solve the problem. Kato-san, being a gracious host, hopped up and placed a spoon at my place setting but I was determined not to revert to western-style utensils. I pretended not to see the spoon and pressed forward. At this point my friends were all watching this war of wills - kanen yose mosuku vs. Jane. Kato-san hops up and places a set of raw-wooden chopsticks at my place - "here" she says, "these will be easier." No, I think, if they can all do this I want to be able to as well. I finally manage to get a respectable amount cleared from my plate, taking about 10 times longer than my friends, but I did it.

At this point Hiroko-san chuckles and says "you have konjo." Not sure of the meaning I ask her if this is a good thing. She explained that for one to have konjo you have tough spirit, or guts or will power to get you through a difficult situation. I laughed and said "ooooohhh, my mom would so agree with you on that one!" I like this meaning, which has much more positive connotations than being stubborn. It reminds me that if you really want something you have to put your head down, get focused and move forward. If you use your konjo then all things will be possible and this I find inspiring.